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The Foul Ball I Didn’t Get

April 26, 2013

The Foul Ball I didn’t get

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The Foul Ball I didn’t get
By Arty 84
Last night at Fenway Park was a night that I will never forget. It goes up there with seeing Curt Schilling 200th win, 2007 World Series Game 1, seeing the Sox win the AL East in 2007 and of course the Sox Yankee game where Boston hit 4 home runs in a row. Those nights will never compare to last night.
My mother was very kind to get some tickets for the game last night verse the Houston Astros. We sat in wonderful seats provided by my mothers boss in right field near the pole. Before I go on any further, I have been to about 150 MLB games in my life in almost every stadium in this country and have NEVER got a foul ball. Not once, not ever.
Around the 5th inning last night, I could go for another beer. My girlfriend need to go the bathroom and we both could use some pop corn. There was 1 out in the top of the inning. I figure we’d have enough time to grab what we needed and go back to the game in time for at least the last 2 outs of the bottom.
Now if you read my past blog about the 5 dollar beer scam, you will understand the lines at Fenway Park. A 100 year old stadium that is not quite setup for modern concessions. We decided to split, I’ll get the beers, she’ll get the popcorn and peanuts. Her line was moving a lot faster than mine. After I agreed to this, I realize she was getting the cheap way out, how didn’t I see that one coming.
So I look over and see my girlfriend making her way over to me with just nuts. “where’s the popcorn” I cried. She had told me they were all out and she panic and just got the peanuts. While this was happen I realized that it was already the bottom of the inning and Ortiz just got a home run. At this point I thought this is all I missed.
We make out way back to the stands, popcorn-less and holding 20 dollars worth of beers. Thats about 2 beers for those who don’t know what we are talking about. When we get to the seats my mother goes “wow you missed all the action” I told her I knew, the Ortiz home run. She goes “no a foul ball hit your seat. A guy from Houston hit it and it landed right where you are sitting. You would of got it”. “What?!, how come you didn’t’ get it” i sobbed. “It hit and rolled” she said.
I look at my girlfriend and she starts laughing at me. Shows I never got a foul ball before. Now granted I’m 28 years old, so I prob would of took a picture with it and then give it to a kid, but granted I would of like to touch at least one white ball in my life other than my own for the weekly cancer check.
So if this wasn’t enough, then man sitting next to me comes back to his seat. I stand and someone tells him about the ball. He then elbows my arm and half my 9 dollar beer ends up on me. My girl friend looks over and goes my foot got wet and half way through she sees my shirt all wet and starts laugh yet again.
Now granted if this is the worse thing that has happen to me all week, then it was still a good week. I’m leaving for a Bachelor party the next day for a good friend of mine, I just spent a week in the DR and I found out I’m going to be a dad. Just kidding, no dad business thank god. I can hardly take care of myself.
So as I sit and reflect on the ball that never was, I wonder would have I caught that ball or would I have been sent to the hospital that night because it hit me in the face, hand and or balls. The answer to that I will never know. Lets home that my 300th game another ball comes my way.
Arty 84
@DjArty84
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From → Comedy, Sports

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